In true Simpsons Stonecutters style, FIFA gathered at their tax-friendly lair in Zurich to elect a new glorious leader.
Following the demise of FIFA's Sepp-tered isle, five candidates made their case to succeed the Rt. Hon. Mr Blatter.
Ultimately, the winner was UEFA's doyen of drawn-out competition, er, draws, Gianni Infantino. The whole affair was, as you can imagine, insufferably dull. There was one notable exception, however.
Based entirely on his name, presidential candidate Tokyo Sexwale was bound to provide some light relief. He certainly delivered on that promise, by withdrawing from the election in his address immediately prior to the election. Watch below:
"It is your problem now" is as pithy a summation of the culture at FIFA as anyone is likely to deliver. Sexwale failed to secure the backing of his own confederation and was unlikely to secure a single vote, so this was a truly heroic way to exit the stage.
Tokyo Sexwale has withdrawn prematurely from the FIFA elections. Rather surprising given his name.
— Gary Lineker 💙💛 (@GaryLineker) February 26, 2016
Tokyo Sexwale makes a gag-laden speech, then WITHDRAWS from race.
— Nick Harris (@sportingintel) February 26, 2016
Tokyo Sexwale: brilliant move. He was highly likely to get zero votes anyway. Gave Congress a laugh and avoids embarrassment of no support.
— Nick Harris (@sportingintel) February 26, 2016
Even though he failed to become FIFA president today, I hope this isn't the last we hear of Tokyo Sexwale.
— Dara Ó Briain (@daraobriain) February 26, 2016
Tokyo Sexwale now speaking and threatening to steal the show (he won't win though). Reveals he became a father three days ago. He's 62.
— Ben Rumsby (@ben_rumsby) February 26, 2016
See Also: Steven Gerrard Shows The Incredible Depth Of Affection He Retains For Liverpool
