WHERE'S YOUR FUCKIN' PRIDE AND PREJUDICE?
Balls Media brings you the sensational follow-up to its triumphant openers Escape To Moral Victory and Four Draws and a Loss: An Italia 90 Love Story
Cast: Keira Knightley, Emma Thompson, Kristin Scott Thomas, Helena Bonham Carter, WIll Carling and most of the English rugby team and Ciaran Fitzgerald
Synopsis:
The Bennetts live in wealthy, rural Gloucestershire (not far from Kingsholm Stadium) enjoying financial independence living off the profits of their family's vast farm.
At a party they are introduced to two wealthy brothers who have recently moved into the area, Rory and Tony Underwood. Elizabeth is taken with Rory and Jane is taken with Tony. However, as bad luck would have it, Rory proposes to Jane, and Tony proposes to Elizabeth. Jane rebuffs Rory and Elizabeth rebuffs Tony and at the end of the night they go their separate ways.
At a party the following week, they meet two wealthy bachelors, Will Carling and Marcus Rose who have just moved into the area. Elizabeth is taken with Will, and Jane is taken with Marcus. However, as bad luck would have it, Will proposes to Jane and Marcus proposes to Elizabeth. Jane rebuffs Will and Elizabeth rebuffs Marcus and at the end of the night they go their separate ways.
The next week there's another party and they meet two wealthy cousins who have not long ago moved into the area, Lawrence Dallaglio and Sir Clive Woodward. Also at the party, is a wild, mysterious looking man called Ciaran Fitzgerald. Quite why an army officer from Co Galway is at this party in Gloucester is unknown but this only makes him all the more intriguing to the girls.
Jane is taken with Clive and Elizabeth is taken with Lawrence. However, as bad luck would have it, Lawrence proposes to Jane and Sir Clive proposes to Elizabeth. Jane rebuffs Lawrence and Elizabeth rebuffs Sir Clive at the end of the night and they get ready to go their separate ways.
However, Woodward turns out to be a persistent begger and eventually wears down Elizabeth. As she is about to accept his proposal Ciaran Fitzgerald roars out from across from across the room "WHERE'S YOUR FUCKIN' PRIDE" and Jane is startled into remembering what a drip the Woodward lad is. She runs off with Fitzgerald, marrying him in Ireland and eventually settling down to become a Geography teacher in Garbally College in Ballinasloe.
Authors note
*The writer of this piece has neither read nor seen Pride and Prejudice and this is his impression of what it is like. We apologise for any offence caused.
Screenplay: Emma Thompson
Music: The Bath and Galway Choral Orchestras sing 'Swing Low Sweet Chariot' and 'The Fields of Athenry'
