Andrew Porter says there were calls made by referee Wayne Barnes during Ireland's Rugby World Cup quarter-final defeat to New Zealand which made his blood boil on the pitch.
"Especially in the front row there is that added pressure, responsibility on you where a decision that doesn't go your way can tip things in favour of the other team," loosehead prop Porter told The Rugby Pod.
"A lot of the time, you know you're in the wrong when a penalty is given against you but when it's those 50-50 calls where you feel a bit hard done by, it's real tough to not get worked up about it.
"I could feel that in the New Zealand game in the quarter-final, my blood was boiling after a while because I felt like I'd been hard done by. There are a lot of people out there who could disagree with me and always have.
14 October 2023; Referee Wayne Barnes awards a scrum penalty to New Zealand during the 2023 Rugby World Cup quarter-final match between Ireland and New Zealand at the Stade de France in Paris, France. Photo by Ramsey Cardy/Sportsfile
"Being a ref is probably tougher than being a player in terms of the amount of criticism you're going to get. One team is always going to hate you at the end of the day.
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"I think they go with whatever team has the momentum in the game, sometimes. If you've been painting bad pictures previously in a game, you shoot yourself in the foot then in that sense.
"If I'm watching another game that doesn't involve us, sometimes I'm like, 'What the fuck was that for?' I've been playing professional rugby for seven, nearly eight years, and sometimes I'm guessing."
14 October 2023; Referee Wayne Barnes and Ireland captain Jonathan Sexton during the 2023 Rugby World Cup quarter-final match between Ireland and New Zealand at the Stade de France in Paris, France. Photo by Brendan Moran/Sportsfile
Porter, who has not yet returned to action with Leinster, felt a real low once he returned home from France following the Rugby World Cup.
"I'm still trying to come to terms with it in my own head but it was gutting," he said about Ireland's elimination.
"I have never felt that much of a low in my career. It's one of those things where there was huge hype and huge expectation. All the fans that travelled over, there was this unbelievable, special atmosphere that I've never witnessed before. All that linked in together, building up really, really high and then it's like a rollercoaster and bang, it felt you were at the bottom.
"I came home and thought, 'This is going to be great', a different environment. I had too much time with my own thoughts and you start playing everything back in your head, thinking of everything you could have done differently, done better. I was really struggling myself, being at home, after being in such a great environment with all those incredibly special people, players and coaches for so long.
14 October 2023; Andrew Porter of Ireland is consoled by his wife Elaine after his side's defeat in the 2023 Rugby World Cup quarter-final match between Ireland and New Zealand at the Stade de France in Paris, France. Photo by Brendan Moran/Sportsfile
"Coming home, I thought it'd be great. I could spend time with my wife which I hadn't got to do since we got married in July. We got married and we were straight back into camp. I thought I'd be able to see my family and friends but I didn't want to do anything. I just wanted to be by myself completely when I came home. It'll be easier now being back in Leinster, a different environment. It was shit, I'm not going to lie.
"Even in my time off, I went back training. I just had to do something. It was like therapy for me, being able to go to the gym for a couple of hours.
"It was nearly like, kick the shit out of myself for three weeks. It was basically just to get myself out of the house. People couldn't deal with me. I was depressing to be around nearly.
"When it came around to going back to training [with Leinster] I was raring to go. I couldn't wait to get in."
