For the next month and a half, Ireland's pubs will be heaving with pint swilling, replica jersey donning rugby fans. The most fashionable, most happening sports tournament of the spring is back.
Put these phrases into practice by arguing with your friends over what is discussed on our daily sports podcast, The Racket:
Some of these fans will be in possession of rare knowledge which intimidates those around them. They will anticipate penalties being called before the referee blows his whistle and they will employ impenetrable jargon with a breezy casualness.
The vast majority will not know will not be like this. Here are six phrases to help the ignorant hordes to avoid embarrassment over the next few weeks.
Jaysus, Parisse's unreal
With the deaths in recent years of Nelson Mandela and David Bowie, Sergio Parisse now stands alone as the most universally praised human being on the planet.
It's safe to say that if Parisse ever did have a shite game (and we're not for a moment suggesting that this has ever happened), we'd never know because no one would have the balls to point it out. He is a secular saint at this stage.
There is a couple of reasons for this.
One is that he is one of the few Italy players that most people know.
Secondly, and more importantly, the fact that his greatest displays usually go unrewarded by victory adds to the romantic mystique of the man, giving him the irresistible air of an heroic martyr.
People feel that they need to praise him all the more because he didn't receive the reward that usually flows from such excellence. One could call it Simon Geoghegan syndrome.
The ref is killing us at the breakdown
In years past, this would have simply been Barnes is killing us at the breakdown. 'Barnes is killing us at the breakdown' is one the prime clichés of modern Irish rugby.
However, for the first time since about 1991, Wayne Barnes won't be refereeing an Ireland game in the championship. No matter, this statement is transferrable to any referee (with one important exception).
The great thing about rugby refereeing is that opinions vary so violently. Social media thrums with overblown but vague criticisms of how a certain referee is 'ruining the game' or favouring one side over the other.
Unless your name is Nigel Owens, you'll have people demanding that the IRB remove you from international rugby forthwith so you won't have the opportunity to ruin anymore games.
*If you establish early on that Nigel Owens is the referee, then cease all your criticisms immediately. Refer instead to how much superior he is to other fussier refs, eg. Wayne Barnes.
Ah for God sake, this isn't soccer
Rugby supporters always like to remind themselves that the game are watching is not soccer.
It may well be the thing they like most about rugby.
If you see an opposition player play-acting or appealing to the ref for a penalty, feel free to remind him through the television screen that it isn't soccer he's playing.
The physicality is unreal
Approximately, five out of every fifteen minutes of rugby analysis must now be devoted to marvelling at the shuddering physicality of it all.
You should always take the time to genuflect at the altar of the physicality on display. There hasn't been a game devoid of shuddering physicality since Ollie Campbell was out-half.
You won't be wrong.
(Insert name of flanker) is a master of the dark arts
The philosophical consensus among the punditocracy these days is that the chief quality an aspiring no. 7 must exhibit is the ability to cheat and not get caught.
If one thinks that the tackle area in Gaelic football is a grey area, then it is nothing compared to the breakdown area in rugby.
This phrase is likely to be less ubiquitous now that Richie McCaw has retired but it is still worth tossing out.
Heave!
The aural accompaniment to a rolling maul. The crowd, both in stand and in pub, will roar the word 'Heeeaave' in a low, deep voice as the maul grinds into gear. This is an easy win for any bluffer. Join in and do so with abandon.
