Introducing Formula 1 Darts
With Formula 1 fast becoming nothing more than a year long victory parade for Sebastian Vettel every year, Bernie Ecclestone turned to the men behind the revival of darts around the turn of the millennium. After much discussion they decided to propose a compromised rules series between the two sports, after abandoning earlier plans to install Scalextric styled loop-the-loops on the track.
The rules are pretty simple. It would be like a normal game of darts except:
- The dartboard is located on the exit of the tunnel of the Monte Carlo track.
- Competitors must throw their dart as they pass by in their F1 car.
- The first to zero wins but you can only throw one dart per lap.
- During pit stops, where tyres and flights are changed, drivers must down two pints of beer before taking off again.
The inaugural event was much anticipated, bringing the world's richest and greatest, filled with fine wine and intrigue and scantily clad beach babes.
How the race unfolded
Early in the race it was clear that the formula 1 drivers were at big advantage when it came to driving; which resulted in them throwing around 10 darts for every one the dart players managed. Raymond Van Barneveld was very accurate with the dart throwing but gearbox troubles saw him retire early.
Midway through the match the rain started to pour down, which of course saw Jensen Button take a big lead while others were busy spinning in the gravel.
As the track dried up things got started to get hectic. The battle of the Hamiltons, Andy and Lewis, raged until Lewis – clearly not able to handle his drink – was forced into retirement when he suddenly broke down crying over Nicole Scherzinger.
A huge pile up in the tunnel, caused by an over eager Romain Grosjean, almost resulted in the match being abandoned, while Fernando Alonso was disqualified for leaving his car to run over and place a dart in the triple 20.
In an even more shocking turn, Mark Webber was giving his marching orders when he turned on teammate Sebastian Vettel and started throwing the darts at him as Vettel attempted to overtake.
Indeed it was Vettel who looked like he would reign victorious until he managed to get stuck on a double eight. After hours of missed attempts, while racing around for another go, he realised the game was up when the crowd erupted into a jubilant blast of Di Di Di Di DO DO DO DO DOOOO signalling that the comparative slow coach Phil Taylor – who refused to wear a helmet for the race – had just completed an incredible maximum finish.
Indeed his win was all the more amazing, considering he had serious problems fitting into his car, which left him starting two hours after everyone else.
Make sure to check out our other glorious compromised rules sport of hurling mixed with rugby.
