As a wise observer once said, there is no wankfest like a McGregor wankfest.
If McGregor makes good on his promise to quit the sport entirely in order to spend more time with his swollen finances, then one can only confess that it will be a great loss to the Irish media.
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But one has to get on with life. The best way to get over lost love is to find new people. Here are five young (and not so young) pretenders to the throne who could fill the McGregor shaped hole in Irish culture.
Jack Byrne
By common consent, Byrne is, after McGregor, the second most confident Irish person ever to have lived.
Martin O'Neill, who belongs to the old stock and has always been partial to a bit of humble workhorse, found Byrne's assertion that he was good enough to make the Euro 2016 squad a bit too McGregor-esque for his tastes.
Very much a creature of the post-McGregor era.
Pyscho Walsh
Back when he could stomach appearing at press conferences, McGregor was fond of telling opponents that he had previous when it came to burying bodies in the desert around Las Vegas.
The Ballylinan man has both the nickname and the way with ambulance emojis to conjure up similarly chilling threats.
Also a staunch defender of his hometown. McGregor always stood up for his homeplace.
@Woolberto for ur own health & safety don't mention Ballylinan in a tweet ever again cheers ?
— Gary Walsh (@PsychoWalsh) January 3, 2016
Neil Seery
McGregor always knew what he was worth.
Indeed, his keen sense of what it is he is worth may have precipitated the events of this week. McGregor's example has emboldened Irish MMA stalwart Neil Seery to demand his just desserts. He won't settle for anything less.
Just like that my demands have gone up I want 30 Euro Diesel money a week or I'm out of here
— Neil 2 Tap Seery (@NeilSeeryMMA) April 20, 2016
It should be admitted that Seery does not have youth on his side in this quest to be the new McGregor. He does, however, have righteous anger on his side.
I was watching the 1916 centenary anniversary thing on the television and I was giving out shit. I’m looking at all them tramps, that’s what I always call politicians, and they’re up there patting each other on the back for destroying our country. Those tramps were sitting up there, front and centre, where normal people should be. That fuckin’ pisses me off. I was losing my mind at these tramps and then my missus tells me to get out and get some fresh air, so I went out running.
James McClean
Conor McGregor knocked Jose Aldo to the canvas in less than 13 seconds in December's world title fight.
Since the retirement of Vinnie Jones, James McClean is the only professional footballer currently active capable of getting himself yellow carded in under 13 seconds.
Like McGregor, McClean would not be averse to a rendition of the Foggy Dew or wrapping himself in the tricolour.
Nate 'the Great' Kelly
Conor McGregor's not quite son and heir, Nate 'the Great' Kelly is going to have to grow up faster than we had at first realised.
Peter the Great needed forty years on the Russian throne, numerous successful wars, a cultural revolution, and a massive expansion of the Russian empire under his watch for him to acquire the nickname 'The Great'.
Nate 'the Great' Kelly had achieved the same feat by eleven years of age.
Like most respected MMA pundits, this pundit (who knows nothing about the sport) had assumed that McGregor would hold onto the middleweight crown until such time as Nate 'the Great' Kelly was sufficiently grown up to take it off him. Like Blair and Brown all over again.
It appears that the mantle has fallen to young Kelly quicker than we had realised. How will he handle the pressure?
With his lengthy and impressive list of underage jujitsu and kickboxing titles, we have full faith in the lad.
Rec215 by ivannaseesomebutts
Read more: 5 Things That Might Still Be Going On With Conor McGregor's 'Retirement'
