I can vividly remember the day my mother reported to me that my under-10s manager (I was nine at the time) had told her 'Mark could be a very good footballer only he has no confidence in himself.' I think I can remember that evaluation so well because as an impressionable youngster, I immediately let it define the rest of my ill-fated playing career.
Throughout underage and right through to senior level it was how I viewed myself; someone with the ability to be good but an ability which was kept a secret between me and the goalposts in my front garden. Even when things were going relatively well and I was given the call up to u-14 county training, I didn't tell anyone and I didn't attend. When I should have felt excited, my feelings were nothing but nerves and inadequacy.
Discussing the ins and outs of underage Gaelic football may seem trivial but it's not when you consider that so many of our beliefs and personal traits are developed in childhood. When reading Marie Crowe's interview with Aidan O'Shea in the Sunday Independent a few weeks ago, I was amazed at how self-assured the Mayoman had always been:
In my head I've always thought and believed I could change Mayo football.
And growing up I always knew I was going to be playing football for Mayo. When I was young, watching them lose I wanted to change that for my county, I wanted to be part of a team that would win and be different.
Again when you read Jim McGuinness' autobiography, his self belief and single-mindedness seeps out through every word. Particularly when he recalls listening to the friends of his late brother, Charles, discuss how good of a footballer he had been:
I am staring at the telly and I'm listening hard now. And the voice in my head goes: I am going to be a county minor. I am going to be a county minor. I am going to be a county minor. I am going to be a county minor.
And from that moment on, I wasn't playing football anymore. I was doing that.
For some reason Joe Brolly has embarked on mission to tear down life coaches and the people he describes as 'mindfulness gurus'. In his columns over the last few weeks, the likes of Enda McNulty, Kieran Shannon and Tony Robbins have all come in for criticism.
Sometimes it has been merited. Particularly when he brilliantly pulls apart the meaningless, Ralph-Waldo-Emerson-wannabe quotes of inspiration, such as 'the biggest adventure you can ever take is to live the life of your dreams,' that do the rounds on Twitter. However his overall dismissal of the industry - for want of a better word - makes no sense. Indeed his latest column in the Sunday Independent, titled 'Who needs a life coach when our teams are full of them?' seems a complete contradiction.
Brolly's dismissal of the benefits of the work the likes of McNulty, Shannon and Robbins do is made completely null and void by his then championing of people such as Kieran McKeever and others in local GAA communities. The irony is that these people are the same characters that the 'gurus' would use as examples of what those with a well-trained mindset can achieve. Sure, to some like Brolly, that winning mindset and self-assured nature may come more naturally than it does to others but in the same way strength, talent and a good head of hair may come more naturally. That's like asking 'who needs a school teacher when half the parish can already read?
In defence of Tony Robbins
On Sunday, Tony Robbins came in for the harshest criticism from Brolly. Robbins is a motivational coach who has worked with the likes of Barack Obama, Serena Williams and Mother Teresa, among countless others. There are many who swear by him but Brolly claims 'His work is an illusion, nothing more than a sales pitch for your money.'
Granted his live shows are over the top but surely of all people, the Sunday Game analyst can appreciate the benefit of showmanship in getting your point across.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Cpc-t-Uwv1I
When you dig down into Robbins' work it is not an illusion. It is practical and relatively simple. His ideas are centered around goal setting and step-by-step methods for changing your mindset and therefore your beliefs and behaviour.
In short, Robbins would argue that if you want to change a characteristic or pattern then you must get to a point where you say 'enough is enough,' set a goal and immediately take action.
Where have we seen this recently? Think Jim McGuinness' infamous meeting with the Donegal players, where they discussed why the Irish News had ranked them 19th in the country. In that room they decided enough was enough, they took immediate action and within two years they were All-Ireland champions.
Through his work Robbins teaches people to not let past behaviour or characteristics define them. Brolly's columns do a disservice to that concept. Every day, in sport and life, there are countless examples of people living out the teaching of the likes of Robbins and Enda McNulty. To many it comes naturally but that does not diminish the need or validity of helping those to whom it does not.
