Mayo may not be in the business of realising dreams but they are prodigious memory-makers, and the 2017 Championship would be eminently forgettable without another thwarted odyssey. More or less all of Mayo's games were unforgettable in an otherwise bland competition briefly illuminated by Down, Roscommon and Carlow, but ultimately once again dominated by the Dubs.
And even if many of the game this year were distinctly average, they still left behind a few emblems in our memories. Here are a few of the more off-beat ones...
Donal Vaughan finds Mayo's bottle
It's too soon to make jokes about Mayo's bottle and/or Donal Vaughan, but the two subjects did conflate in one of the more luckless moments of the year. Roscommon and Mayo slugging it out in the All-Ireland quarter-final was at the 'two drunks scrapping in a chipper' end of prizefighting. And just to accentuate the game's slapstick nature, Vaughan was denied a potentially decisive shot at goal in the second half when he slipped on an errant water bottle, left on the field.
Martin Carney proves local is always better than national
Martin Carney has become a regular in The Sunday Game commentary booth, and is a generally safe option: not exactly bursting with enthusiasm but articulate and insightful nonetheless, and much superior to Dessie 'Des' Dolan and Tommy 'Tom' Carr. But Carney found himself working with MidWest Radio for the latter days of summer, calling games for his beloved Mayo. And swept up in the unique Mayo frenzy he was a revelation, particularly around Brian Sheehan's late free in the drawn All-Ireland semi-final.
Relive the last moments of yesterday's @MayoGAA epic encounter... Just look at what it means to @MD_McAndrew & Martin Carney. #Class pic.twitter.com/ggERdTXJjQ
— Mid West Radio (@radiomidwest) August 21, 2017
Longford take the shirt off a man's back
Longford and Donegal's qualifier clash was largely terrible, more than twenty wides in the first half and no upset worth talking about. Longford did make a contest of it, however, although that may not have been the case without some help from one of their supporters in the crowd. Star forward Robbie Smyth was forced to leave the field with a blood injury, and wasn't allowed back with blood mottled on his number 13 jersey.
Longford forgot to pack a replacement jersey which thrust supporter Eugene Quaine into the limelight. He was wearing a jersey with 13 on the back, so he stood up, whipped off his top, and passed it down to Smyth on the sideline, who finished the game and returned it afterward.
The full story can be read here.
David Brady: Prophet
SCENE: Newstalk studio. Former Mayo midfielder David Brady makes a bold prediction in a gathering of 12 men. (Maybe there were that many, if you include production staff).
He said to them, "Aidan O'Shea is going to be betrayed into the hands of football analysts by playing at full-back to mark Kieran Donaghy. They will kill him, and after six days he will rise to the occasion in the replay."
We're sorry, David Brady. We should never have doubted you.
Joe Brolly believes Jim McGuinness will manage Barcelona
Among the most awful habits in Irish sport is to compare one sport with another and this is a process that usually ends up flattering the GAA; the 'look-at-this-awful-over-hyped-League-Two-soccer-match-on-Sky-imagine-those-fellas-getting-skelped-in-the-Munster-hurling-final-they-wouldn't-last-a-minute' brigade.
This was taken to interesting new heights by Joe Brolly, who reckons that Jim McGuinness could manage Barcelona.
I have no doubt he will be the manager of Barcelona some day because he is an extraordinary person to meet.
He is the sort of person when you meet him you come away feeling inadequate.
He is very charismatic, he is a brilliant communicator and he also does something that most people find very difficult to do - he thinks. I mean he thinks. It's this sort of idea of Sherlock Holmes saying, 'leave me alone, I am going into this room to think'. Jim does that.
There is not a lazy bone in his body. You can tell because the conclusions that he reaches are always very logical and often fascinating.
It's a mark of the guy that after meeting him for two hours in an airport the Beijing manager, after follow-up emails and conversations over the phone that he was confident enough to offer him such a big job because that's a huge team in China, the Beijing team.
James Horan calls Bernard Flynn a 'tit'
Ah, Mayo again. Aidan O'Shea gets far too much criticism, and the latest to find a reason to slag him off was Bernard Flynn, who drew a barmy connection between O'Shea posing for selfies with fans and his supposed 'selfishness' on the field of play. Horan was asked about it on Newstalk and more or less ended all debate on the matter by pithy remarking: "Ah Bernard Flynn, I have to say, he made an absolute tit of himself".
Fin.
Carlow
Carlow were one of the stories of the summer, and proved to be the only team to keep a clean sheet against Dublin. They kept a high media profile and as a result told a number of terrific stories. 'Keeper Craig Kearney worked in Supervalu selling match tickets until a couple of hours before the Monaghan game, before which Sean Murphy sheared 50 sheep.
Murphy also brilliantly turned down a Man of the Match interview with Sky Sports after the Dublin game as he was too disappointed with the defeat.
Magnificent.
The Navan Playlist
Andy McEntee began the process of restoring Meath football this year, to mixed success. Part of his plan is naturally to make Pairc Tailteann into a fortress, and the person operating the system responded with the following set of ferocious tunes as throw-in with Sligo was delayed.
Don't know what to make of the fact that the Páirc Tailteann playlist includes the theme tune to Ally McBeal... followed by Sex And The City
— Gavan Reilly (@gavreilly) July 1, 2017
