A Cork GAA Club Have Just Come Up With The Greatest Match Report Ever Written

Sometimes you just have to put your hands up and admit the game is over. We're not entirely sure if there's some kind of a competition among PRO's to come up with the greatest GAA match report but, if there is, it's well and truly over.

The Glanworth minor and ladies footballers were both in action on Thursday night and as you'll soon see it didn't exactly go to plan for Glanworth. Rather than bang out a couple of paragraphs about the defeats the Glanworth PRO decided to get a bit creative.

Presenting the Prince of Despair.

Now, this is a story all about how,
Thursday nights football got flipped-turned upside down,
And I'd like to take a minute,
Just sit right there,
I'll tell you how It became the a night of hurt and despair!!

In west Kilavullen is where our minors played,
The pitch now the playground where they needed a big play,
Chillin' out maxin' relaxin' all cool
The boys were shootin some foot-ball outside of the boot,
With a couple of scores we were a few to the good,
Then Clyda started making trouble in our neighborhood,
Our coach got in one little fight and the ref got scared

He said 'I'm movin' you outside with your auntie and uncle over there'
We battled and we fought with them play after play,
But we cracked in the finish and we were sent on our way,
We gave them a kiss and they gave us our ticket.
Now thats all over with its onto the women.

The ref whistled for a ball and when it came near
with opposition so fresh a few scores put them clear,
We all wished we could say that this goal was rare
But Fermoy thought 'Nah, forget it' - 'Lets kick on some spares'

It was blown up with Fermoy about 7 or 8 in the clear,
And I yelled to the ladies 'Go home, smell ya laters'
I just looked at my kingdom
I was finally there
Sitting on the throne as the Prince of Despair

Big thanks to Barry Johnson for sending this our way.