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Definitive Ranking Of The 14 Maddest Stories From This Bonkers World Cup Group Stages

Cathal Austin
By Cathal Austin
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14. Ghana

The 'black stars' had a very bizarre world cup altogether. Airlifted money, and a Saipan-esque episode in which Sulley Muntari and KP Boateng were sent home ensured that this will be a tournament to forget; for them anyway. We love this picture of John Boye kissing his stack of bills, 31 minutes before scoring into his own net yesterday.

13. Cristiano Ronaldo's Midnight Caller

A 15-year-old Cristiano Ronaldo fan took things to a new level by scaling the walls of his idol's hotel, before perching himself on Ronaldo's bed. The Portuguese didn't call the police but instead let the intruder escape the same way he got in.

12. Ann Coulter's very anti-soccer comments

Introducing Ann Coulter...

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The same people trying to push soccer on Americans are the ones demanding that we love HBO’s “Girls,” light-rail, Beyonce and Hillary Clinton. The number of New York Times articles claiming soccer is “catching on” is exceeded only by the ones pretending women’s basketball is fascinating.

There are no heroes, no losers, no accountability, and no child’s fragile self-esteem is bruised.

She's mad.

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11. The Laser Beam Attack On Russia

Russia were dumped out of the World Cup in bizarre circumstances, lettin slip a lead over Algeria that would have put them through. It seems a laser beam momentarily blinded keeper Igor Akinfeev in the build-up to Algeria's equaliser.  

10. Cameroon

The indomitable lions experienced a similarly controversial World Cup campaign, what with the strikes and the violence..

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9. Rihanna's World Cup tweets

I think it's fair to say that the World Cup and Rihanna are quite un-related in the minds of the average person - probably why her World Cup tweets are so entertaining.

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8. Broccoli

The World Cup song is shite. So is Pitbull but the dancing broccoli behind him is pretty great.

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7. Huge Ungainly Watches

The bloated Hublot stop-clocks make the fourth officials look unnecessarily stupid.

 

6. Chilean fans storming the Maracana

FIFA fined the Chilean federation after Chile fans without match tickets stormed the Maracana in an attempt to watch their side take on Spain.

5. The soundest fans at the World Cup

Brazilian stadium officials will be especially sad to see the Japanese fans leaving the country: They took to cleaning up stadiums after all of their group games no matter what the result.

4. The Mexicans consistently losing their shit

Mexican manager Miguel Herrera has been a revelation, a passionate human wrecking ball - we love his screeching and arse-slapping antics.

3. The silly string

It's  the shit.

2. Eamon Dunphy

Dunphy's foulmouthed slip-up have caused him to take top spot in our balls.ie pundit leaderboard. We loved it and we’re sure you did too.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QdF8SzTkzsc

1. Suarez

Nobody thought he'd do it again! Definitely the most shocking event of this summer's World Cup.

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