Every day, these transfer rumours throw together a five-a-side team of eclectic footballers. Today is no different, with world-beaters, hound dogs and lads with marvellous names. It truly is silly season.
Welcome to the Balls Bullshit-O-Meter. It measures the validity of a transfer rumour with its scientifically approved formula of measuring the smell of the bullshit emanating from the morning reports. '1' is a fresh meadow with '10' setting off nuclear toxicity alarms throughout the land.
Gareth Bale (Real Madrid to Tottenham Hotspur)
A reunion could be on the cards in North London. Marca reports that Tottenham are open to a Gareth Bale return. Tottenham have stated the stipulations of a potential deal, telling Real that they're only willing to pay around £56m in a transfer fee and half of Bale's £600,000 per week wage.
However, considering Zinedine Zidane doesn't want Bale in the side, coupled with Bale being picky about his next destination, Real may not have many alternatives. It's never nice to know that you're not wanted, especially not when it's your birthday. Happy birthday, Gareth!
Bullshit-o-meter: 5/10
Anthony Stokes (Tractor to Adana Demirspor)
Jesus, remember Anthony Stokes? The former Celtic star has had a tumultuous time of it over the past year and a half. Since being released by Hibs in January 2018, the striker has moved to Greece and Iran, causing consternation in the process. Now, according to the Daily Mail, Stokes is set to move to Turkey.
Adana are an ambitious First Division club who boast ex-Manchester United midfielder Anderson. Stokes received contract offers from the likes of Salford City and Bolton Wanderers but wants to continue his world tour along the Mediterranean.
Bullshit-o-meter: 2/10
Mario Mandzukic (Juventus to Everton)
Everton are desperate for a striker. Having been linked to any striker worth their salt over the past number of weeks, the Toffees have turned their attention to Croatian attacker Mario Mandzukic. Tutto Juve have reported that Everton are willing to part with £12m for the striker.
However, Everton would need to rid themselves of flop Cenk Tosun before they make any deal for Mandzukic. Furthermore, Everton are also interested in Mandzukic's teammate Moise Kean and have already offered £27m for the Italian striker's services.
Bullshit-o-meter: 6/10
Marvelous Nakamba (Club Brugge to Aston Villa)
📰✍️ Marelous Nakamba reportedly is trying to force a move to #avfc ⬇️ pic.twitter.com/CVCdmz6DtN
— thevillazone (@thevillazone) July 15, 2019
These are the kind of rumours that get us up in the morning. The beautifully-named Marvelous Nakamba has his heart set on a move to Villa Park, according to Belgian outlet Nieuwsblad. The Zimbabwean international is refusing to train with Club Brugge in the hope that he can force through a move to the newly-promoted side.
Nakamba would command a fee of around £10m, with his signing potentially spelling trouble for Conor Hourihane's spot in the Aston Villa side.
Bullshit-o-meter: 2/10
Joelinton (Hoffenheim to Newcastle United)
The Daily Mail state that Newcastle owner Mike Ashley is willing to part with £36m in order to complete the signing of Brazilian striker Joelinton from Hoffenheim. You read that right, Newcastle are willing to spend almost £40m on just one footballer. The world is going mad.
Of course, Newcastle did manage to flip Ayoze Perez for £30m earlier in the window, plus Salomon Rondon doesn't look to be returning to St James's Park. I just hope Joelinton can fit into Steve Bruce's system.
Bullshit-o-meter: 8/10
