In what is comfortably one of the more outlandish stories from the whacky world of the Premier League, today's Sun on Sunday frontpage features an image of Wayne Rooney sprawled and apparently unconscious on his kitchen floor after being knocked out by Stoke City full back Phil Bardsley.
The two were participating in a spot of shadow boxing when Bardsley connected with a jab to Rooney's jaw that sent him careering to his expensive marble kitchen floor. The sheer slapstick of this story is something to behold and as you'd expect Rooney punch video has been the talk of Premier League world.
One wonders what Louis Van Gaal thinks of it all, though it seems, predictably, we weren't shown the whole story, here's Phil Bardsley's wife:
Seen the sun, 2 mates havin a laugh video doesn't show Wayne jumping straight up and laughing with Phil #cleveredit
— Tanya Bardsley (@TanyaBardo7) March 15, 2015