Deck the Fitz Halls etc. As you, humble Balls reader will know only too well, Christmas is less a time for family, goodwill and all other hackneyed ephemera that a supermarket will try to sell us in a TV ad, but it is instead a time to cut a groove in your couch to feed your rapacious appetite for premier league fixtures.
This Christmas promises to be no different, with a blizzard of Premier League fixtures smacking our screens.
It begins on Friday, December 22nd, as Arsenal and Liverpool clash at the Emirates on Sky Sports Premier League from 7.45pm. (You may remember that this game was initially mooted for Christmas Eve).
The following day brings the interlude of a feckin' Clasico, live from noon on Sky Sports Football. Sky also have Everton v Chelsea live from 12.30pm on their Premier League channel, followed by a late kick-off between Leicester and Manchester United at 7.45pm.
Before that, BT Sport 1 have live coverage of Burnley vs Spurs, at 5.30pm.
Once Christmas is out of the way, the football really begins on Boxing Day St Stephen's Day.
Spurs v Southampton kick off at 12.30pm Sky Sports, with Liverpool v Swansea live on the same channel at 5.30pm.
The following day, December 27th, features Newcastle v Man City live on Sky Sports from 7.45pm.
December 28th brings the gift of Crystal Palace vs Arsenal, live on Sky Sports at 8pm.
Disappointingly, you'll have to watch reruns of the football on December 29th, with no live games of note slated.
December 30th kicks off with the Old Firm Derby on Sky Sports from noon, followed by Manchester United v Southampton on BT Sport 1 at 5.30pm.
Arsenal are on telly on New Year's Eve: their trip to West Brom is on Sky Sports at 4.30pm. Before that, BT Sport are screening Crystal Palace/Manchester City at noon.
2018 kicks off with the erstwhile David Moyes derby Everton v Manchester United on Sky at 5.30pm, with the same broadcaster showing Swansea/Spurs live at 7.45pm the following day.
January 3rd brings the heavyweight clash of Arsenal and Chelsea at 7.45pm on Sky, and it all wraps up on January 4th with Spurs v West Ham at 8pm.
So, from December 22nd to January 4th, it is possible to watch 15 live Premier League fixtures, along with the biggest derbies in Scotland and Spain.
Get comfortable.
