This January transfer window has been the story of Chelsea's vaulting back to the future, as they frantically scrabble about for a Big Man Up Top. Antonio Conte's attacking vision is relatively rudimentary, relying on a big man up front to make runs across a centre-back to hold the ball up to bring Hazard and co. into play.
Given Alvaro Morata's patchy form and the fact that social media's Michy Batshyuai isn't trusted by Conte, virtually every striker with an XL jersey size has been linked with a move to Chelsea including Ashley Barnes, Peter Crouch, and most gloriously, Andy Carroll.
In recent days, however, it looked like that they were set to sign Edin Dzeko, perhaps doing so under the He Played Well Against Us criteria. This logic has had mixed success in the Premier League: for every Cristiano Ronaldo going to Man United, there's been a Charlie Adam to Liverpool.
Today, however, there's some fretting that the Dzeko deal won't go through, with the Mirror claiming that if it all falls apart, the club will try to wrangle Olivier Giroud from Arsenal. It had been anticipated that Giroud would go to Dortmund in part-exchange for Pierre-Emerick Aubameyang, but that move has stalled as Arsenal haggle over a £10 million disparity in the respective side's offers.
Elsewhere, Lucas Moura is on his way to Spurs, and Don Balon in Spain are writing that Real Madrid may be willing to part with Gareth Bale to tempt Harry Kane to the Bernabeu. At the start of the season, Madrid looked the epitome of a well-run club, deviating from their Galactico transfer policy to invest in youth, Marco Asensio the most prominent example.
Today, however, they are 19 points behind Barcelona and are fresh from humiliation against Leganes in the Cope Del Rey, meaning that a reversion to the big-name policy is in the offing. Links with Kane have been persistent, as have been links with Eden Hazard, Thibault Courtois and Neymar Ltd, who Goal bleat will be allowed to leave PSG if he helps seal the Champions League this year.
We're not so sure.
And finally, in a deal presumably agreed in 1983, Liverpool are set to sign Falkirk left-back Tony Gallacher for £200,000.
