Let's misquote Half Man Half Biscuit: In the Kingdom of the Blind, the one-eyed man is king. And in the Kingdom of the Bland, Niall Quinn is looking earnestly at Thierry Henry.
With much of sports punditry festooned by manspreading maestros of mundanity, being oneself and saying something informed with conviction is an increasingly revolutionary act.
Thankfully, a few brave men and women did exactly that. Here, we celebrate them, as we crown our Pundit of the Year for 2016.
GAA
The loose format and somewhat organised chaos of the Sunday Game live studio calls to mind that scene from Dr. Strangelove: ' Gentlemen. You can't fight in here. This is the War Room!'. Joe Brolly remains the chief commander of RTE's merry band of anarchists, remaining an eloquent and compelling screen presence. While some of what he says is unfairly critical and hyperbolic - branding Mayo as "celebrity losers" being one example - his clear grasp of what is good about Gaelic games, along with his ability to spin a yarn, means he remains right in contention.
On Sky, Jim McGuinness impressed despite making relatively few appearances, while ubiquity's James Horan was interesting after the drawn All-Ireland final, querying on Sky Sports why the Mayo players had given interviews to Sky Sports.
In hurling, you couldn't but be impressed by Jamsie O'Connor's detailed and incisive analysis, or at least at his ability to draw different types of arrows and shapes on Sky's touchscreen. An honourable mention too for Daithi Regan on Newstalk, who continued to deliver his unique brand of endearing disgust.
But the winner is Brendan Cummins. The former Tipp goalkeeper is a superb co-commentator, mastering the exceptionally difficult act of saying a lot while talking very little. He was one of the best things about the epic semi-final replay between Kilkenny and Waterford, reflecting the magnitude of the occasion, few-second chunk by few-second chunk. Cummins will be working with the Kerry hurlers next year, so here's hoping it does not deprive us of his elbow patches on RTE, if nothing else.
Winner: Brendan Cummins
Rugby
Rugby on terrestrial TV is becoming an increasing rarity: the Champions Cup was more or less invented by Satellite broadcasters, and Ireland's best moments were tucked behind a paywall too: the win in South Africa and the belated exorcising of the All Blacks were not freely available, the latter taking place in the outer limits of Eir Sport 2. That means that we don't see as much as we would like of RTE's new, post-Hook panel.
Shane Horgan's use of technical phrases and jargon can occasionally befuddle the casual viewer, but it does at least sound impressive. By contrast, there lies a strain of genius in Donal Lenihan's simplicity, while the intensity of everything that Ronan O'Gara says is compelling.
Elsewhere, Paul O'Connell and Gordon D'Arcy were typically impressive in their appearances on Sky Sports.
Tyrone Howe, Alan Quinlan and Mick Galwey all spoke remarkably well on the same channel following Anthony Foley's death. Howe, in particularly, delivered a moving tribute live on air, just minutes after learning of Foley's passing.
The winner in the rugby category, however, is D'Ary's Irish Times colleague Liam Toland. Toland's commentary on Eir Sport during the All Blacks game was great, and, like Brendan Cummins, he is pithy in great moments. Eloquent, incisive and personable, Toland constantly sets the perfect, er, tone.
Winner: Liam Toland
Football
We have been long since disabused of the notion the idea that a great player will automatically make a great manager, relegated to the outer reaches of the football consciousness along with Alan Shearer and Newcastle sometime in 2009. For a while, Shearer looked to prove that true in the case of pundits too, but he was quite good on Match of the Day in 2016, at his best when expressing righteous anguish at the audacious limits of Newcastle; their relegation proving to be of great loss to BBC viewers. That mantle has been taken by Thierry Henry, the TV equivalent of watching expensive wallpaper dry.
In contrast, Gary Neville's brief defection to Real Football allowed Jamie Carragher fill his capacious shoes as Sky's main man with aplomb, while Neville has been pretty good in a reduced role since his return, despite his frustrating habit of constantly repeating misdiagnoses on co-commentary. Graeme Souness' deep misanthropy remains a compelling television event.
But 2016 will be remembered for the rise of Chris Sutton. Sutton is a man who has realised that football punditry is much too important to be taken seriously, and his rise from the western edge of the TV schedules (Scottish football on BT Sport 2) to Match of the Day has been meteoric. Sutton does not deliver the nuanced breakdown that is favoured by the Monday Night Football gang. Instead, he forms an opinion, will disapprove of conflicting opinions and will defend to death the right he has to say so. Sutton's constant needling of fellow pundits - particularly Stephen Craigan - is an absolute joy, and proof that television is better when nobody gets on.
Winner: Chris Sutton
Olympics
It was an Olympics year, which meant that we were given the quadrennial delight of RTE's placing centre stage a gang of pundits we have never heard of. Among the most memorable of these was Neville Maxwell, who broke down in tears upon the silver medal-winning heroics of the O'Donovan brothers. We did have a few familiar faces, too: Derval O'Rourke was a delight, while Jerry Kiernan's trying-his-best-to-pretend-he-doesn't-care-when-in-fact-he-cares-more-than-most schtick retained its charm.
Boxing, naturally, was at the centre of RTE's coverage, and here we found their break-out analytical star. Eric Donovan was cogent, engaging and above all insightful: his work at RTE's touch-screen was better than anybody's, and made a technical sport accessible to all with consummate ease.
Winner: Eric Donovan
