Wayne Shaw is 46, and a bit on the heavy side - weighing in at twenty stone. He's embracing this though, even releasing a 'Roly Poly' chilli sauce during the build up to the Arsenal game.
Funnily enough, he wasn't always this big. Before becoming an ice cream man and a club stalwart at Sutton, he was actually in the same youth side as Alan Shearer and Jeff Kenna. Shaw was a striker for Wellington Sports FC.
Obviously, he didn't reach the heights of Shearer. The Newcastle legend won a Premier League title, represented England and is the top flight's top scorer of all time. He was also on punditry duty for the BBC and came out with a completely unnecessary jab at Shaw.
Alan Shearer talking about Sutton Utd reserve keeper Wayne Shaw ??? pic.twitter.com/V80bdPuqtu
— Pie Sports Booze ? (@piesportsbooze) February 20, 2017
I followed my dreams to the Premier League. He followed his to the burger van
A bit of a swipe at a former teammate who slept three nights this week at the Sutton ground and was spotted this afternoon hoovering the dugouts.
@DanDartsDawson more competitive hoovering going on at Sutton tonight! #worldhooveringchamps pic.twitter.com/WEixkrKiod
— Grant Fraser (@GrantFraser4) February 20, 2017
It's doubtful that Shearer ever had to hoover the dugouts at St.James' Park. Shaw seems to be the kind of guy who'd laugh it off, but people on Twitter weren't so quick to dismiss it.
Shearer slagging off the Sutton keeper saying "I followed my dreams to the Premier League, he followed his to a burger fan.
What A Twat— Paul (@guinners1) February 20, 2017
"Followed his dreams to the burger van" 🍔 cheap shots by Shearer fired at the reserve keeper! #FACup #suttonunitedvsarsenal
— Amie D (@amieisdancing) February 20, 2017
Don't expect to see Shaw in action unless there's a red card for the first team keeper - he hasn't played a minute of the cup run.
To be fair to him though, at least he's still got a head of hair. Which is more that can be said for others...