Stephen Ferris, who in addition to the many other glittering accolades that sit alongside his name, is our Six Nations pundit on the Racket, recently told a belter of a story from his final Six Nations game for Ireland.
It was as dismal a crescendo as one could possibly imagine.
A weakened Irish scrum was ground into the dirt by the English juggernaut. George Hook queried afterwards whether the Irish team doctor might have given one of the props a flick of the blade to deliver uncontested scrums.
The hosts were loving it.
Mired in the bottom of a ruck, he was subjected to the grotesque preening of that deep voiced martinet, Alex Corbisiero, who loomed over him and screamed 'Welcome to the house of pain!!'
Corbisiero didn't even make it into the book but one incident from that sorrowful encounter could not be ignored.
Dylan Hartley received an eight week ban for biting Ferris's finger - an offence which, if nothing else, demonstrated Hartley's incredible versatility in the field of accumulating bans.
In the middle of all the carnage, Dylan Hartley bites my finger. We have a ruck out wide. I tackle him to clear him out. My arm is draped over his shoulder as we hit the ground. He latches onto my finger and sinks his teeth in. I hop up - what the fuck? - and hit him a couple of slaps on the head 'You dirty bastard
He denies it, in his New Zealand accent.
'Yeah, whatever'.
There is another scrum being set. I jog over to Nigel Owens the referee.
'Ref, look at my finger. Dylan Hartley just bit me.'
'Ok. Hold on a second.'
He calls the two captains over. Now we've had an accusation of biting. I didn't see anything but it will be looked at afterwards.' End of story.
That sums Hartley up. Roger Wilson who played with him, who played with him at Northampton, tells me he is a really good lad. I am sure he is a decent fella, but he is dirty on the pitch.
Stephen Ferris' autobiography 'Man and Ball' has just been released as paperback and you can buy it in all good bookshops now.
Here's the infamous incident.
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