We Need You To Rank The Best Fictional Sports Coaches Ever

Mark Farrelly
By Mark Farrelly
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After years of debating, night after night spent arguing and posturing, we're finally looking to find out once and for all who is the greatest fictional sports coach of all the time.

The list is long and decorated but only one can emerge victorious. Ladies and gentlemen, we feature some of the frontrunners below but now the task is up to you ... Vote early, vote often!

The Favourites

Coach Gordon Bombay

Coach of...

The Mighty Ducks/Team USA

Pros:

Gifted player in his day, learnt from the best (Hans), unorthodox training methods, willing to learn from his players.

Cons:

Showed blatant favouritism to Charlie and to the Ducks team in general. There are hundreds of junior ice hockey teams in America and yet nearly all of the Ducks end up on Team USA? Give over.

His tagline...

Every time you touch the ice, remember that it was Hans who taught us to fly.

The closing argument...

Coach Eric Taylor

Coach of...

The Dillon Panthers/The East Dillon Lions/The Pemberton Pioneers

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Pros

Excellent role model, gives second chances, hot wife, hot daughter, hell of a man in general.

Cons

Doesn't have the full respect of those in power and will inevitably be replaced by Joe McCoy.

Most memorable quote...

Clear eyes, full hearts, can't lose!

The video evidence...

!

Coach Whitey Durham

Coach of...

The Tree Hill Ravens

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Pros

No-nonsense attitude, will give you advice on women and just about everything else.

Cons
Recommended

Nowhere near as charming as other candidates. Not willing to win at all costs. His preoccupation with making sure his star player didn't die from his heart condition almost cost his team the state championship.

Most memorable quote...

You have made a hell of a comeback. You played as team. Even if we lose this thing, it's still a damn fine moral victory. Now, maybe that's okay with you. Maybe you want to look back and tell your grandkids about the state championship you almost won.

The closing argument...

Coach Tony D'Amto

Coach of...

The Miami Sharks

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Pros

Motivator, speech giver, a man who's been there and done it.

Cons

Pissed away all his money, chased away anyone loved him, can't stand to see his own face in the mirror.

Most memorable quote...

And I know if I am going to have any life anymore it is because, I am still willing to fight, and die for that inch because that is what LIVING is. The six inches in front of your face

The video evidence...

The Outside Bets

Stewart Jackson - Renford Rejects

Danny O'Shea - Little Giants

 Irv Blitzer - Jamaican bobsled team

Anna Montgomery - Elma soccer coach

Your man - Barry's Tea Ad

 

The Vote

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